A mere simpleton

I liked you for 2 months ever since we had English class together. Seeing you 4 days a week is more than enough for me. I hated how you always hang out with that girl all the time cos I’m jealous of both of your close proximity to each other, physically and emotionally.

Then you tell me about your feelings about her, basically everything about you two. I sense the comfortness of you telling me all these when you don’t even share it with your close friend. I already knew this instance, that I’m just a close friend to you.

I confessed to you one day in the library, I told you I like you. But then, instead of nervousness, all I felt was relief. That made me realized, all these times, I never really liked you. Instead, I feel tired of thinking all these crap and nonsense when I have so much things more important to think about. I’m thinking about things that I know will never happen to me. All I felt was a close and comfortable friendship. I realized, when I see both of you together, it’s not because I’m jealous of you both being close, just the fact that I don’t like her as a person at all. Sorry for judging, but it really bugs the fuck out of me when I see her around. 0:) 

The truth is, I never understood the feeling of liking someone, or feeling fond. Never had I ever really made the effort of understanding these things, because there is nothing to understand. Other people might say that I’m wasting my time, maybe I am. But I’m just human, and I’m very very sure that I’m not the only one who feels this way towards other people as well.

You might be irritating sometimes, you don’t even know it. Well, you can’t blame me, some of my friends actually feel the same way too alright. And you can be a bit talkative sometimes. Everyone has their own traits so I’ll digress from here.

All I know now is that, you were never the right one for me. Or maybe I lost my feelings towards you, I don’t know. What I know is that, I don’t hate you and our friendship will never be the same as before. It’s not your fault, it’s just me because I don’t think I can ever talk to you as the same way anymore.

You were my close friend. But now, I’m sure we’re both just.. friends. No hard feelings :)